I really don't know where to begin. So far this year has been throwing curve balls at me in every direction possible.
The last blog I wrote was about manifestation and creating the dreams you want. I still believe you can manifest and create your dreams; however, not sure where I personally went wrong on this one. Well, needless to say, I manifested the van I wanted and also got it converted. I manifested setting out on an amazing journey traveling around the country sharing my Sound Meditation with others. I wanted this all to happen so badly, that I think I stopped listening to my inner voice. The van wound up having a ton of issues and only got me to Knoxville, Tennessee. Oh, life on life terms!
On a positive note, I had an enormous amount of support and love by my side which made it easier to say, "okay, let's try this again at a later time, it's not for now." So, I decided my next move was to move to Savannah, Ga with my boyfriend. My next path in life, a new journey to grow with the person I fell in love with and continue this life together in a new place. Little did I know, life was about to throw me another curve ball, right in the heart.
Life had a different plan for me.
During my time down there I found out my now ex-boyfriend had multiple physical and emotional relationship with other women while he was with me. As you can believe I was devastated and I am still going through the emotional pain of healing. I am beyond hurt and learning again how to truly love myself. I called him my other half, because I felt so connected when I was with him. He filled me up with this love I was waiting for, it was like I was missing something inside. Based on that, I notice now that I was regressing not progressing in my growth. I needed this love from another person. When I think about it now, I need to love myself wholeheartedly first and not rely on someone else to fill that need. This is something that I am working on and will continue to do so and when I'm ready I will be able to attract a person who already loves themselves as well and there will be no codependency.
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” - Buddha
By focusing on your well-being and giving yourself daily self-love, this creates a strength within you, so that you're able to give love and receive love without attachments. I didn't realize it when I was was in it, however I stopped giving myself self love during this relationship, because I thought I was complete with him by my side. Even though this was heartbreaking, no love is ever lost and every person we meet in life shows us a beautiful lesson for growth. We just have to be open to these growth moments.
Are you experiencing any pain at this moment? Love, loss, physical pain, emotional pain, and/or low self-esteem?
How do you heal? What steps do you take to show yourself self-love?
I am creating a platform on Instagram (@peacefully_rooted) called
FEEL it, to FREE it
It's a platform to go to listen to other people's stories and to learn how other's heal. I want to create a community of healers! I believe when we share our emotional pain it can be one way to start the process of healing. By sharing our stories we now open the door to connect with one another on a deeper level and we can begin to create and share healthy ways to heal. We don't have to do it alone!
Let's come together and FEEL our emotions and let's FREE them in healthy ways.
I am ready to love myself unconditional and it's time for me to SHINE BRIGHT!
I look forward to meeting you and hearing your stories and ways that you have learned to heal your emotional pain too!
If you like to be part of this healing community you please following my Instagram page to get updates AND submit a video about your story and what tools you use to help heal!
Please email to Kaitlyn@peacefullyrooted.com